1. Charlie Sheen isn't addicted to crack, crack is addicted to him.
2. Charlie Sheen is two and a half times the man Chuck Norris is.
3. Crack cocaine is just the street name, the real drug is Charlie Sheen.
4. Charlie Sheen never sleeps. He's up all night having sex with "goddesses".
5. When Chuck Norris kicks, he splits atoms. When Charlie Sheen kicks, he forms perfect lines of coke.
6. Charlie Sheen is such a winner, that no matter who wins the Superbowl, he keeps the trophy.
7. If you look up the definition of "win" in the dictionary, you will see a picture of Charlie Sheen.
8. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But Charlie Sheen says that "can't is the cancer of happen".
9. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. Charlie Sheen slams shots of straight vodka for weeks on end.
10. Chuck Norris is the strongest man on Earth. But Charlie Sheen is a "rock star from Mars."
11. Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Charlie Sheen every night.
12. The Pope asked Charlie Sheen's permission before he recently pardoned the Jews for Jesus' crucifixion.
13. MLK had a dream. It was about Charlie Sheen.
14. Charlie Sheen could make Ellen Degeneris straight. He just doesn't want to.
15. Chuck Norris always wins. But Charlie Sheen is "bi-winning".
1 comment:
After starting my fourth job and a generally long day, this blog really has given me a good laugh. Or to put it another way, it's "winning!"
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